♪ HEATHCLIFF, HEATHCLIFF, NO ONE SHOULD ♪
♪ TERRIFY THEIR NEIGHBORHOOD ♪
♪ BUT HEATHCLIFF JUST WON'T BE UNDONE ♪
♪ PLAYING PRANKS ON EVERYONE ♪
♪ THERE'S A RACE TO BE ON TOP ♪
♪ THE COMPETITION DOESN'T STOP ♪
♪ MIXING WITH THE LADIES FAIR ♪
♪ BEING CHARMING, DEBONAIR ♪
♪ THE GAME WILL REIGN SUPREME ♪
♪ AND NO ONE CAN DENY-Y-Y-Y ♪
♪ THEY'LL MAKE A MYSTERY ♪
♪ AND ALWAYS HAVE AN ALIBI-I ♪
♪ SO JOIN IN THE JUBILEE
♪ THE CATS ARE GREAT, THEY'LL ALL AGREE ♪
♪ FINDING EACH CALAMITY
♪ THE CAT'S SUPERIORITY
♪ OH O-OH O-O-OH O-OH
♪ O-O-OH OH OH-OH O-O-OH O-OH ♪
♪ HEATHCLIFF, HEATHCLIFF, NO ONE SHOULD ♪
♪ TERRIFY THEIR NEIGHBORHOOD ♪
♪ BUT HEATHCLIFF JUST WON'T BE UNDONE ♪
♪ YOU SHOULD REALIZE
♪ HE CAN WIN IT WITH YOU
SAY, HERE'S SOME INTERESTING NEWS.
SOME FILM PEOPLE ARE MAKING A MOVIE RIGHT HERE IN OUR TOWN.
OH, YEAH?
HEY! THEY'RE LOOKING FOR SOME LOCAL CATS TO BE IN THE MOVIE.
I'M GONNA TAKE HEATHCLIFF TO THE AUDITION TODAY.
HEATHCLIFF?
HEH. UNLESS THEY GOT A PART FOR A LAZY SLOB,
YOU'RE WASTING YOUR TIME.
WE'LL SEE.
LOOK OUT, HOLLYWOOD, HERE COMES HEATHCLIFF.
NEXT.
GET A LOAD OF DAT!
HUBBA BA-VROOM, LET'S GIVE THE CHICK ROOM.
NO-CLASS CREEPS.
I'LL GIVE 'EM A VA-VA-VROOM.
PERFECT--NOW YOU'RE WITH ALL THE OTHER JUNK MAIL.
NEXT.
THAT'S ME.
OW!
HEATHCLIFF WON'T GET AWAY WITH THIS.
NO WAY. HE'S GONNA PAY.
UH, I HOPE HE PAYS, 'CAUSE I'M FLAT BROKE.
HEATHCLIFF, THIS IS THE DIRECTOR,
CLAUS VON STERNBERG.
HMM. A VERY INTERESTING CAT.
I THINK HE'S PERFECT TO PLAY OPPOSITE SONJA.
YOU SEE, YOU'RE EXACTLY WHAT WE'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR.
AND HIS TABBY-COLORED COAT IS PERFECT.
NOW, REPORT TO THE SET TOMORROW MORNING AT 5:30.
IT WAS A LUCKY STROKE WHEN THAT CAT WALKED IN HERE, RIGHT?
YA. HE LOOKS ENOUGH LIKE OUR STAR, JACQUES LeSHAR,
SO THAT WHEN HE DOES ALL OF JACQUES' STUNTS,
NO ONE WILL KNOW THE DIFFERENCE.
YOU'RE A GENIUS, CLAUS.
I KNOW, I KNOW. OOH!
QUIET, QUIET...
QUIET ON THE SET.
HERE ARE MY TWO LITTLE STARS
ALL DRESSED AND READY TO WORK.
HERE IS WHAT WE ARE DOING.
SONJA, YOU'RE BEING HELD PRISONER
HIGH UP IN THE TOWER OF THE CASTLE.
AND, HEATHCLIFF, YOU'RE GOING TO RESCUE HER,
TAKE HER IN YOUR ARMS,
AND GIVE HER A BIG KISS.
PLACES, EVERYONE!
NOW, IN THE FIRST SCENE,
ALL YOU DO IS WALK ACROSS THIS LITTLE WALL.
THIS IS GONNA BE A PIECE OF CAKE.
EVERYBODY READY?
HEY, WHAT'S THE DEAL?
SOME LITTLEWALL.
HEATHCLIFF, WALK ACROSS THE WALL TO THE OTHER SIDE.
GOT IT?
LOOKS LIKE WE GOT HERE JUST IN TIME.
YEAH. HEH HEH HEH.
ACTION!
AH, THIS IS A BREEZE.
THINK I'LL DO IT WITH MY EYES CLOSED.
CUT! PRINT!
THAT WAS BEAUTIFUL, HEATHCLIFF.
DOWN YA GO, MR. HIGH AND MIGHTY.
YEOWWWWW...
YOU'RE QUITE A DIRECTOR, HECTOR.
SOMEBODY CATCH THAT CAT!
HEATHCLIFF, COME BACK.
WAIT TILL I GET MY HANDS ON THAT DIRECTOR.
I'LL PULVERIZE HIM.
GRRRR...
HEATHCLIFF, I THOUGHT YOU WERE DOOMED.
YEAH? WELL, IT'S THE DIRECTOR WHO'S DOOMED.
WAIT'LL I TAKE CARE OF HIM.
HEATHCLIFF, YOU HAVE MY MOST HUMBLE APOLOGY.
I DON'T KNOW WHY THE WALL FELL DOWN.
IT MUST HAVE BEEN AN ACCIDENT.
GRRRRR...
HEY, IT WASN'T AN ACCIDENT.
HECTOR DID IT. I CAN TELL--
ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS GALLOP OVER TO THE DRAWBRIDGE,
THEN YOU LEAP FROM ONE SIDE
OF THE DRAWBRIDGE TO THE OTHER. GOT IT?
OK. INTO POSITION.
HOW COME I'M ON THE BOTTOM?
'CAUSE YOU'RE MORE NEAR THE FLOOR.
UH, OH, YEAH. I FORGOT.
THANKS, WORDSWORTH.
REMEMBER YOUR MOTIVATION.
YOU WILL DO ANYTHING TO RESCUE YOUR LOVELY SONJA.
YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. LET'S GO.
ENOUGH ALREADY.
ACTION!
FASTER, FASTER!
YEOW!
CUT!
OH, NO. POOR HEATHCLIFF.
HEATHCLIFF, YOU HAVE MY MOST HUMBLE APOLOGY.
IT WAS JUST AN ACCIDENT,
BUT IT LOOKED SO REALISTIC,
WE'RE GOING TO KEEP IT IN THE MOVIE.
GET THE SHARKS READY!
ANOTHER ACCIDENT, HUH?
THIS DIRECTOR IS A MENACE TO THE MOVIE WORLD.
I QUIT.
BUT WHAT ABOUT OUR LOVE SCENE
WHERE YOU HOLD ME IN YOUR ARMS AND KISS ME?
THINK ABOUT THAT.
I LIKE YOUR THINKING.
HOLD THAT THOUGHT.
FOR THE LAST SCENE ALL YOU DO IS SIMPLY...
SWIM ACROSS THE MOAT, CLIMB UP A VINE TO THE TOP OF THE CASTLE,
AND FIND SONJA. GOT IT?
I GOT IT.
BUT IF ANYTHING FUNNY HAPPENS,
THIS DIRECTOR'S GONNA GET IT.
WORDSWORTH, MUNGO, WIND 'EM UP
AS FAR AS THEY'LL GO.
LET'S WIND 'EM UP TIGHT TO GIVE HIM A FRIGHT.
PLACES EVERYBODY.
SONJA, GO UP TO THE TOWER
AND WAIT FOR HEATHCLIFF.
I'LL BE WAITING FOR YOU, DEAREST,
AND DON'T BE LATE.
ACTION!
HEY, THAT DIRECTOR NEVER SAID THE SHARKS WERE GONNA ATTACK ME!
I'LL FIX 'EM.
NICE WORKIN' WITH YA.
HEE HO HO HO HO...
YOO-HOO!
HMM. IT'S A LONG WAY UP,
BUT IT'LL BE WORTH IT.
YEOWWW!
THIS'LL TEACH HIM.
WE GOT HIM, ALL RIGHT.
HEATHCLIFF'S HOT TONIGHT.
A DRAGON WITH CAT'S FEET?
GIMME A BREAK.
YOWEEE! AAH!
THE NERVE OF THOSE THREE, TRYING TO STEAL MY BEST SCENE.
DON'T WORRY, SONJA. I'M ON MY WAY.
OH, HEATHCLIFF, MY HERO.
[WHISPERING] What happened?
I thought you stood me up.
NEVER, MY SWEET.
NOW, PUCKER UP AND GET READY
FOR THE KISS OF A LIFETIME.
CUT! CUT!
CUT? WHAT DO YOU MEAN, CUT?
OK, TAKE HEATHCLIFF OUT,
PUT THE STAR IN.
I DEMAND AN EXPLANATION.
IT IS VERY SIMPLE.
I AM THE STAR, AND THEY HIRED YOU TO DO ALL MY STUNTS
SO THAT NOTHING HAPPENS TO ME.
NOW, MOVE ASIDE SO I CAN KISS THE GIRL.
OF ALL THE ROTTEN, NO-GOOD, CHEATING TRICKS!
SORRY. THAT IS BUSINESS.
WELL, I'M GONNA GIVE YOU THE BUSINESS!
STOP! I AM THE STAR! STOP!
OH, THE STAR WANTS TO STOP.
YEOWWW...
FEELING BLUE, JACQUES?
HEE HEE HEE HEE...
I'LL NEED MAKEUP!
NO PROBLEM.
SOMEBODY HELP ME WASH THIS OFF.
ALLOW ME.
ENJOY YOUR BATH.
HEE HEE HOO HOO HOO...
YOU CAN'T DO THIS. I AM THE STAR!
HEATHCLIFF, THANK YOU FOR RESCUING ME.
UH, WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
WELL, YOU RESCUED ME FROM KISSING JACQUES LeSHAR.
YOU'RE A MESS.
IT'LL TAKE A WEEK TO GET YOU CLEANED UP,
AND I'VE GOT TO FINISH THIS PICTURE TODAY.
YOU'RE THROUGH!
OH, HEATHCLIFF...
MAY I HAVE A WORD WITH YOU?
PLEASE HELP ME OUT.
IF YOU DO, I PROMISE I'LL STAR YOU IN DOZENS OF MOVIES.
THIS IS ONLY THE BEGINNING.
YEAH? WELL, AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED,
IT'S THE END.
[SOBBING] ONLY THE BEGINNING...
WELL, SO MUCH FOR BEING A MOVIE STAR.
TO ME, YOU'LL ALWAYS BE A STAR.
REALLY?
REALLY.
YOU KNOW, SONJA,
I HAVE TO ADMIT,
YOU HAVE EXCELLENT TASTE.
HEE HEE HOO HOO HOO...
[TAUNTING] ♪ YA-YA YA-YA YA YA
YOU'VE HAD IT, RIFF RAFF.
HA HA HA HA HA...
WHOA!
YOW!
[WHISTLING]
YATZEN-FRAHGEN!
HEY, CLANCY, WHAT DO YOU WANT US TO DO WITH THEM?
NOTHING RIGHT NOW.
'ELLO, LADS. HOW ARE YOU DOIN'?
WHAT DO YOU MEAN, HOW ARE WE DOING?
WE WERE DOIN' FINE TILL YOU GUYS CAME ALONG.
WHAT DO YOU WANT, ANYHOW?
WE'RE GOING TO WANT NOTHIN'
WE JUST WANTED TO GIVE YA NOTICE TO PACK YOUR THINGS.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN, PACK OUR THINGS?
ME BOYS AND I ARE TAKIN' OVER THE JUNKYARD,
SO YOU TWO AND THOSE OTHER THREE CLOWNS
ARE GOING TO HAVE TO VACATE.
SAYS WHO?
SAYS US-- THE DIRTY DOGS.
Both: YOU'RE THE DIRTY DOGS?
YOU WANNA MAKE SOMETHING OF IT, MUTT?
NO. I WAS JUST ASKIN'.
I SEE YOU'VE GOT A SOCCER BALL THERE.
YOU KNOW HOW TO PLAY?
OH, I'VE PLAYED A LITTLE IN THE OLD COUNTRY, LAD.
HAVE A GO, LAD.
I'VE PLAYED A LITTLE SOCCER MESELF, LADDIE.
WOULD YOU LIKE A LITTLE CONTEST?
HMM.
WHAT KIND OF CONTEST, ME BOY?
HOW ABOUT IF YOU DIRTY DOGS PLAY A SOCCER GAME AGAINST US?
THE WINNER GETS THE JUNKYARD.
THE LOSERS HAVE TO LEAVE.
YIP. WELL, BOYS, WE'VE BEEN CHALLENGED.
SHALL WE ACCEPT?
IT WON'T EVEN BE CLOSE.
WE'LL ANNIHILATE THE BUMS.
ALL RIGHT, THEN. IT'S SETTLED.
WE'LL COME BACK HERE TOMORROW.
YA BETTER DO SOME PRACTICING, LADDIE.
[LAUGHTER]
ARE YOU CRAZY?
WE CAN'T BEAT THOSE GUYS IN A SOCCER GAME.
HAVE YOU GOT A BETTER IDEA?
AHEM.
WELL, UH, NO. I, UH...
EXACTLY.
SO WE NEED YOU TO PLAY FOR OUR TEAM, CLEO.
AND, BUSH, WE WANT YOU TO BE OUR MANAGER.
PLAY FOR YOUR TEAM? ARE YOU CRAZY?
WHY WOULD I WANT TO DO A THING LIKE THAT?
WELL, BECAUSE IF WE ALL LOSE OUR HOME IN THE JUNKYARD,
WE'D HAVE TO MOVE IN HERE WITH YOU.
YOU'RE RIGHT. I'LL PLAY.
GOOD. WE GOTTA WORK AS A TEAM.
IF WE DO THAT, WE'VE GOT A CHANCE.
HOW 'BOUT THE REST OF YOU GUYS?
DID YOU EVER PLAY SOCCER?
I CAN HOLD MY OWN.
OK. HOW 'BOUT YOU, WORDSWORTH? EVER PLAY?
I PLAY A MEAN TAMBOURINE.
GOOD, WORDSWORTH. REAL FINE.
HOW 'BOUT YOU, MUNGO?
UH, NO.
I NEVER PLAYED A TAMBOURINE,
BUT I GUESS I COULD LEARN.
OHH...
BUSH, YOU'VE GOT TO MANAGE THIS TEAM.
THINK YOU CAN DO IT?
OF COURSE I CAN MANAGE THIS TEAM.
I'M AS SHARP AS ANYONE.
WE'RE IN TROUBLE.
Sonja: IT'S SO EXCITING.
I'VE NEVER BEEN TO A GAME BEFORE.
I CAN HARDLY WAIT UNTIL IT STARTS.
Cat: YAY! YAY! HERE WE GO!
YAY, TEAM! YAY!
Announcer: TODAY'S MATCH PITS THE UNDEFEATED DIRTY DOGS
AGAINST THE UNENVIABLE JUNKYARD JOKES.
WHAT'S THE MEANING OF ALL THIS JUNK ALL OVER THE FIELD?
THAT STUFF WAS TOO BIG TO MOVE, SO WE LEFT IT.
THE GROUND RULES ARE THAT ANY TEAM CAN USE ANYTHING ON THE FIELD DURING THE GAME.
HA! THAT'S RIDICULOUS.
EXACTLY.
[TWEET]
OOF!
ATTA BOY, LEROY!
GRRR... GRRR....
HEADS UP, HECTOR.
YAY! YAY!
GOAL! GOAL!
YAY, TEAM!
YAAAAAY, TEAM!
Announcer: THE JUNKYARD JOKES NOW LEAD 1-0!
JUST LUCK, ME LADS. JUST LUCK.
ARE YOU SURE YOU PLAYED THIS GAME BEFORE, LADDIE?
GRRRRR...
♪ LEROY, LEROY, HE'S OUR MAN ♪
♪ HE CAN STOP THAT BALL LIKE NO ONE CAN! ♪
YAHOOO!
Announcer: THIS RIFF RAFF KID IS SOMETHING, FOLKS.
HE LOOKS UNSTOPPABLE.
GO, TEAM GO!
YAY!
WAY TO GO!
LET'S GET HIM.
WHEW.
[TWEET]
YAY, TEAM! YAY, TEAM!
OHH... OHH...
ALL RIGHT, GANG, YOU'RE DOING GREAT.
WE ARE BAD, LAD.
UH, I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING BAD, DID I?
OH, STIFLE YOURSELF, MUNGO.
YOU'RE DOING A GREAT JOB, LEROY.
WITHOUT YOU, WE WOULDN'T STAND A CHANCE.
NOW, LET'S GO.
HEY! LEMME OUTTA HERE!
STOP! COME ON!
HAS ANYBODY SEEN LEROY?
[TWEET] GOALIES READY?
WE'RE IN TROUBLE NOW.
HEY, BUSH, COME HERE.
YOU'LL HAVE TO PLAY GOALIE TILL WE FIND LEROY.
GOALIE? I'VE NEVER PLAYED GOALIE BEFORE.
SPARE ME THE UGLY DETAILS AND GET OUT THERE.
BUSH, THIS WAY! THAT'S THEIR GOAL.
HA! LOOKS LIKE A GREAT GOALIE, LADDIE.
ALL RIGHT, CLANCY, WHERE'S LEROY?
HA HA. I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT, LAD.
[TWEET TWEEEET]
WHOA!
HOW DID THIS GET HERE?
THANK YOU, BUSH.
OH, NO!
YAY! YAY!
RIFF RAFF, I'VE GOT AN IDEA.
BUSH CAN SMELL A STEAK A MILE AWAY,
SO WHAT WE SHOULD DO IS...
[WHISPERING]
HEY, MUNGO, I GOT A JOB FOR YA.
[WHISTLING]
GRRRR...
SHUSH. UH, SHUSH.
GRRRR...
OH, NO. THE DOG ATE OUR STEAK.
[WHINING]
Announcer: 5-5, FOLKS. IT'S A TIE.
UH, HERE'S THE STEAK, RIFF RAFF.
PERFECT.
[SNIFF SNIFF]
I SMELL STEAK!
YAY, TEAM! YAY, TEAM!
YAY, TEAM. GO, CATS, GO.
PTUI!
THAT'S NOT STEAK!
CLEO!
10 SECONDS.
5 SECONDS...
I GOT IT!
2...1...
YAY! YAY!
[TWEEEET]
GAME'S OVER!
YOU BIG DOPE.
WHY, I OUGHT TO--
YIKES! YIKES!
COME BACK HERE!
♪ 2, 4, 6, 8!
♪ WHO DO WE APPRECIATE?
♪ OUR TEAM, OUR TEAM! YAYYYY! ♪
WAIT A MINUTE. WAIT A MINUTE.
WHO WON?
WE MAKE A GREAT TEAM.
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